Freak Magnet

Bartenders come across a lot of strange people. Musicians working in bars also encounter many strange people. But in my experience, women musicians who work in bars come across the strangest people of all. I have only been doing this for a year, but my fellow musicians (mostly men) have dubbed me as somewhat of a "freak magnet" of some sort.

I don't know if its just because I'm a woman, or maybe because I play an abnormal instrument for my size, but I really do seem to attract a lot of freaks when I am working. I usually get some nut bar coming up to me in between my set breaks wanting to talk and then they decide that they should follow me around the rest of the evening. Now to be fair, I do attract a lot of nice and interesting people as well, and often you can sit and visit with someone that you met on a gig, but really, who wants to hear about that. I will share with you some of the infamous crazies who graced me with their presence.

One particularily rowdy night at Lydia's, a guy approached me. He had many, many peircings and tattoos and a metallica shirt on. He followed me around, sat at the table with me, and of course, he was deerrruuuunnk. Finally, we start playing again and his friends tell him they want to leave. He starts babbling in a very loud voice "NO! We have to stay... I'm in love with the bass player and I want to stay NO NO NO". His friends finally dragged him out. We all had a chuckle.

One another night at Lydia's, a man sends Gillian, our singer, a drink. Gillian goes to thank the guy and then realizes that he actually meant to send me the drink. This guy ends up sending me one after the mix up, so I wave, and go begin the set with the band. Mid-way through the set, I get another drink from the same guy. He was probably in his early 30's, but he looked like he was on crack or something... seriously. He looked rough, and he was by himself and drinking alone. At the end of the set, he sends me another. I go and thank him, get a billion cheesy pickup lines, he buys me yet another drink (by this time, Brandon the lovely bartender just started to give me soda... and no vodka) and I finally tell the guy I'm 19. He leaves me alone after that... but comes back the next week.

At another Freehouse gig, the band notices two guys who are getting pretty wasted, but seem to be really enjoying the music. We play the set, and this guy introduces himself as Dean. He looks about 27. He buys me a drink and begins to tell me how attractive a female bass player is. He asks how old I am and I tell him 19, but he wouldn't believe me, so he just continues shamelessly with the pick up lines. He asks me for my number a few times, I wouldn't give it to him, and he sticks around all night waiting to get my number. Of course, I don't give it to him. It was also really funny because he started asking my band members if they thought he was too old for me.

On a similar occasion, a man comes up to me in the middle of a set at the Freehouse, shakes my hand, and tells me "There is nothing more enticing and stimulating than a woman who plays the bass". Umm... right.

Now these stories aren't really that bad. These guys are more than annoying than anything, but last week at Lydia's I met a guy who creeped me out so badly that I have been having dreams about it all week. So heres how it went down:

I finish a set and this guy introduces himself as Chris. He is a little older, maybe 35, and during the whole set he was cheering after solos and seemed to really be enjoying the music. After he introduces himself to me he tells me a little about his his Grandfather started the jazz festival. This is descent thing to talk to someone who plays jazz except for the fact that he was a close talker. His face was uncomfortably close to mine. I finish the conversation and go and sit down and visit a friend who informs me that this Chris character showed up to one of his shows, hit on the guitar players mom, and then proceeded to tell everyone about how he wanted to shoot his girlfriend. Nice.

So the night continues and my friend leaves, which was a little disapointing because I never got to say bye and I wanted to hang out. We finish playing, this Chris guy talks to me a couple more times, and all conflict and awkward situations are diverted. I leave thinking that I have avoided him. I then decide to walk to Vangeli's down the street from Lyd's to go see if my friend is there.

I get there and my friend is not there, so I turn around to leave and I hear someone call out my name. I turn around and it is Chris. He asks if I want to have a smoke. I tell him no and that I'm going home for the night, and I'm not feeling to well. He gets a little offended and asks me to just visit him when he has a smoke. I decline, and keep walking away from him. He then starts to tell me about how he was mad that I couldn't even give him the time of day, and that he just wanted five minutes. I tell him that I saw him at Lydia's and he listened to me play music all night, so really I wasn't avoiding him. Now, my friends, this is where I get slightly disturbed. He then says "You didn't play music for me all night, you played music for everyone. You just need to play music for me. How can you do that. I just want you to play music for me". It was all very Criminal Minds-esque when the serial rapist is about to attack his next victim. I backed away slowly, told him goodbye, got around the corner and ran like hell.

This actually scares me. Today is Sunday, so I really hope he doesn't return for Part II.

I will continue to share my ridonkulus stories of my life as a freak magnet, and give you an update on Chris "You need to play music just for me" whateverhislastnameisIdon'twannaknow.