Updates... Again

I realize that I havn't posted on my lovely little blog since, ohh, january... So I thought I should update you on what is new in my life since then. Then maybe after this I'll write a real post about what is on my mind right about now.

Well, since January, I have turned 20. Thats all that is new. Since I have not been in school for awhile, I sleep in until noon, and then I practice if I feel like it, watch Dr. Phil and Oprah. And then make a little supper. Then if I have a gig in the evening I do that. Or else I sit watch tv, or go out. And my room is a mess. That pretty much sums up my life right now. Sad, isn't it?

I have been doing a lot of dreaming though, awake and sleeping.

Some of my awake dreams include moving out. But that would require me getting a job... which is also something I dream about. I have been looking for a job and applying at a lot of random places, but I havn't been hired yet. I'm starting to feel pretty anxious and bored and generally bad sitting at home by myself. I definatley don't enjoy it. Not anymore anyway.

And I worry. I worry about lots of things. I worry about gaining weight. That sounds super lame and superficial... but I don't go to the gym anymore because I am not in school. And the puddles that are outside right now are up to my neck, so I can't start rollerblading yet. And I worry about what I'm going to do with my life, and getting a job, and school, or lack thereof.

So, I'm basically at this point in my life where I'm not doing anything that is making me feel very good. I feel that going back to school in Saskatoon is not for me, but on the other hand, I don't want to leave Saskatoon. I want to get a job, but I'm worried it will interfere with the gigs I play. I want to move out, but I can't unless I get a job. I want to go to the gym, but I can't because I quit school. I would pay for a gym membership, but I can't because I don't have a job.

Don't get me wrong, I'm super happy that I am not in school anymore, but I am needing a change in my life. Because right now I feel like a useless, lazy ass with a messy room and no motivation to do anything about it.

Fantastic.

That is where my life is at right now.

song of the day: Packt like sardines in a crushed tin box- radiohead